Yesterday morning I had rather a shock. I woke up a little earlier that usual, went into the bathroom and saw my cat looking rather still, so I bent down to see what was wrong with her. Rigor mortis - she was dead. We all knew it was coming - she was getting really thin, refusing to eat, and just generally very ill. Presumably she died just before I woke up, because mum and Lizzy leave at 8:00, and dad wakes up at that sort of time. I found her at around 9:00 (Woke up at about 8:30/8:45) and was the first one to find her like that.
What's strange though, is that I have been unable to cry about it - and not because I didn't love her. I loved her a lot, I was incredibly close to her. I can't cry because I just feel numb, like a piece of my soul has gone or something. Maybe it's because we were so close that I can't cry, or maybe it's because I found her dead and accepted that she is gone. Maybe my mind just doesn't work like other people's. I don't know, it's all too confusing.
Also, I seem to have lost all my rhythm and ability to play the guitar, which is annoying. I'm sure it'll come back to me though (It had better do!).
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